The Two Pillars of Marriage

The Two Pillars of Marriage

K.I.S.S. Keep It Simple Stupid.

I found the K.I.S.S. principle

to be very effective in my life.

When it comes to marriage,

Ephesians 5:33 rest it all on two pillars…

“Love & Respect”

A husband must love his wife &

 a wife must respect her husband.

On these two pillars rest the foundational

needs of a man and a woman.

 

needs of a man and a woman.

Think about it, the male looks for respect all his life.

This desire for respect can become

a battle for some fathers and sons.

The son wants the respect of his father but

the father sees the immaturity in the son.

As much as the son wants the respect of the

father, he will have to learn how to earn it.

The father will have to make sure he does not

discourage the son’s need for respect or he

will find he will lose the respect of the son.

When a son leaves his father and mother to be joined to his wife,

his primary focus for the respect he needs will be on his wife.

The little girl has a desire to be loved.

There are two dreams her heart longs for…

A knight in shining armor, a strong man to take her

in his arms where they shall live happily ever after.

She also dreams of being a mother, having

the love of her children throughout her life.

It is these two basic needs a marriage is designed to fulfill.

These two pillars were meant to

be built upon and joined together.    

In the end, love and respect

are not to be two, but one.

They need each other. 

With this in mind we can begin to understand what

God have to say about the marriage He has designed.

God says to husbands… “love your wife”.

The husband is given the responsibility

of being the head of the wife.

The vivid picture of this is Christ is the head of the church.

The head Jesus was the Savior.

The husband as head must be the savior, provider.

Jesus knew the church was imperfect.

He made the sacrifices for the mistakes of the church.

Christ did not expect perfection from the church but

He had hope that His sacrifices, the truth of His Word,

would help His church become more beautiful and perfect.

He has been very patient not demanding as the Head.

The head in all he does must

communicate, in words, action and love.

If this communication is lost, if either in the wife’s

heart or mind, he will lose the respect he needs.

The husband is to love his wife as himself.

This means he will model a life of

 being in God’s Word and prayer.

He will model this by revealing that

everything he does is for His head, Christ.

As he shows respect for his Head,

he will reveal the respect he desires.

The wife is to respect her husband.

She is to be submitted to him.

  

As a husband, I want my wife to know

everything I do is for her and the family.

She does not always see that the way I do.

But I am always looking for her support.

A husband’s love for his wife cannot stop be-

cause he sees something he does not like in her.

So also a wife’s respect cannot stop because she sees

her husband moving in a direction she does not want to go.

When this happens (and it will happen) a wise

couple will go to God’s Word and prayer to find peace.

 

Scripture Reading

Ephesians 5:22-33 NIV

22 Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. 31 "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh."  32 This is a profound mystery — but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.