Training Children Making Mistakes

 

Training Children

Making Mistakes

 

 

Training is all about discipline with Love

It starts with parents who love enough to be disciplined 

Disciplined parents producing disciplined children

Love covers a multitude of sins

Every parent makes mistakes

The spirit is willing and the flesh is weak

We all have weaknesses

Love must be the foundation of all we do

If so, when we build things that fall

 They fall on the foundation of love

When things fall on the foundation of love

 Mercy is there, giving the ability to rebuild again

 

 

 

Making Mistakes

 

I grew up in poverty.

 

I deeply loved my parents and they loved me.

 

 My two brothers and sister would say the same.

 

Both my parents grew up in Christian homes.

 

My mom had parents who were married

until death separated them

and they were very active in the church.

 

My grandmother owned a flower shop.

 

She was so successful, my grandfather

closed his mechanic shop to work with her.

 

My Dad’s father died before my dad

could know who he was.

 

My grandmother went through several marriages

and my dad struggled.

 

The church was a big part of my parents’ lives.

 

 I was born while my dad was in seminary.

 

They started a church in East Toledo.

 

They were loving and caring parents and Christians.

 

BUT

 

They failed at their marriage.

 

They failed at working out their differences

and the marriage ended in divorce.

 

I was three days into the first grade

when we moved to separate homes.

 

Neither Mom or Dad left the faith,

 but struggled all their lives.

 

Their failure to work out their differences

put them and us four siblings in poverty.

 

Dad struggled, but paid the child support

of $40 a month.

 

When he had us for the day…

 

 It was a treat to share fries at McDonalds.

 

Dad would sing a song (I hated)…

 

 “I wish I had a nickel,

I’d tell you what I’d do

I’d buy me a candy bar

and eat is in front of you.”

 

I know my dad would never eat a candy bar

in front of us kids but…

 

 He knew he did not have a nickel

to buy a candy bar.

 

My dad told me when he was in hospice…

 

 He thought of suicide when we were young,

and the only reason he did not give up on life

was we kids needed him…

 

 No matter how little he could provide.

 

Dad remarried and divorced.

 

 It was only later in life that

he started to get ahead in life.

 

Mom never remarried but had to work.

 

 She worked in my grandmother’s flower shop.

 

Mom could not help us kids too much with homework…

 

 As she was tired from work

and new ways of teaching in school challenged her.

 

If we wanted candy…

 

 We looked for pop bottles to cash in

at the local carry out.

 

I always thought I was dumb.

 

 I hated school as I was bullied.

 

I did good if I could get a grade as high as a “C”.

 

I graduated not knowing how to read but…

 

 I was able to understand how to work with my hands.

 

I was embarrassed to be around people.

 

 I thought they would look down on me

and make fun of me.

 

Yet, with all my insecurities…

 

 I knew God loved me and I loved Him.

 

It was only as I became an adult

that I saw God loved others

as much as me.

 

My parents failed in marriage and

that brought about failures as parents.

 

 Thinking I was dumb…

 

It was only later in life I realized

we all come into this world knowing nothing.

 

Everything comes through learning and experience.

 

I realize now I am not dumb, in fact…

 

 I think the brain is the greatest part God

made in the human body.

 

I love to think.

 

I taught myself to read, yet

I still do not like to read,

but I do love research.

 

I think of the man I could have been

if I had a father who could have shown me

the ways of life.

 

A mother who had more time to help me become

better at home making skills and education.

 

You could say my parents had a good divorce…

 

 But I would say no divorce is good.

 

The reasons for not fostering love and commitment

as married partners are of the worst sort.

 

Because a lack of love and commitment destroys lives.

 

I realize there are relationships where one is trying

to keep the relationship together and the other is not.

 

Where some are selfish in their ways

and bring greater harm.

 

I may sound hard and not understanding…

 

But you cannot ever look at divorce as a good thing.

 

A divorce is a failure at the core of life, “LOVE”.

 

Love is commitment and it takes skill and work.

 

Recently, when Sandy was in a nursing home

after surgery for a broken hip…

 

 The woman in the room with Sandy asked

after several days of watching our lives…

 

“Do you ever get ticked off at each other?”

 

I gave her a quick answer at the time…

 

 But a few days later I told her…

 

I get ticked off at Sandy
and she gets ticked off at me.

 

We do get angry with each other.

 

  But we choose to love.

 

There are things Sandy doesn’t like about me 

and the same is true about me.

 

But we choose to focus on making every day

a good day

 

That happens as we cover what we don’t like with love.

 

So yes…

 

 I know there are things Sandy doesn’t like about me

and I will not change.

 

There are things I don’t like about Sandy

that will not change.

 

Those things are big things.

 

But we have chosen to make our love bigger

and that is why we have celebrated

over 51 years of marriage.

 

As a result…

 

 Our children and grandchildren could have never

had as good of lives as they do,

had we chose to divorce.

 

So, training up a child in the way

they should go starts with modeling Love.

 

We love because we want to.

 

We also love because we have to.

 

God is love and we should be the same.

 

Training up a child means teaching

them the basic skills of life like…

 

 Cooking, laundry, organizing, cleaning,
how to manage money, etc.

 

Training up a child means teaching skills

that will help land a job or run their own business.

 

Good parents know how to make love practical

with skills, and character in everyday life.

 

If you don’t teach them as parents…

 

 The world will force them into slavery.

 

I grew up in poverty

and I have watched those who grew up in homes

with parents who had more than mine.

 

I noticed those parents know the work

and responsibility it takes to be successful.

 

Their children were trained to be successful.

 

People who learn disciplines

and how to relate to others.

 

It is not that poorer parents

cannot do the same things.

 

  This is not to say all wealthy parents

who train up their children are successful.

 

What I am saying…

 

 Is this word “Training” is key to success.

 

If a child is trained in being organized…

 

As an adult, they will have the knowledge to use

those organizational skills in their home and work.

 

If the child is trained in communication skills…

 

As an adult, they will understand others

and others will be able to understand them.

 

Many adults today are living in bondage

because they do not have the skills for life.

 

If you are a parent who does everything

and gives everything to your children beware…

 

 They may grow up to be dependent on you and others.

 

If you are a parent too busy to train

your children in the basics of life…

 

 Not being available to make sure

they do what they are to do…

 

They may grow up thinking they can sneak by,

or talk their way out of everything.

 

Make sure, as a parent, you see that your child

came into this world with a clean slate.

 

You are the one who will influence

what goes on that slate.

 

God has endowed each person with gifts and abilities.

 

It is up to you to discover those things

and develop them in your children.

 

Remember it is up to you to train up your child.

 

 Use others who can help you and avoid

and remove those who will not help your child

learn and develop according to what God shows you.

 

It is not enough to lead your children

through the wilderness

or leave them in the bondage of Egypt.

 

Train your children how to live in the Promise Land…

 

To their full potential.

 

 Where they will know God’s love

and have reason to love Him.

 

And how to love others as they love themselves.

 

Training is all about discipline with Love.

 

It starts with parents who love enough to be disciplined.

 

Disciplined parents producing disciplined children.

 

Love covers a multitude of sins.

 

Every parent makes mistakes.

 

The spirit is willing and the flesh is weak.

 

We all have weaknesses.

 

Love must be the foundation of all we do.

 

If so, when we build things that fall…

 

They fall on the foundation of love.

 

When things fall on the foundation of love…

 

 Mercy is there giving the ability to rebuild again.